Sunday, February 21, 2010

Stepping Out In Faith

Hebrews 11: 1-3

1 Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. 2 This is what the ancients were commended for. 3 By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God's command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.


The time had come for us to move on. I had been the Minister of Youth and Education at our church for three and one-half years. I had applied for both church and higher education positions. The church positions said they wanted more experience or more focus in either youth or education or wanted us to move to a geographical location we did not feel comfortable in. The higher educational institutions doubted my commitment to post-secondary schools. We prayed for one door to open.

I was accepted into a PhD program a year earlier but was unsure whether this was a viable option for someone with a family. Concerns about health insurance were relieved when I found I could continue my present insurance. Since this was the only option available, we decided to “step out in faith.”

I announced my resignation to our church family and we prayed to sell our house by ourselves. A week passed and we had no real offers. We began to get angry because we had specifically prayed for the house to sell within a week. That weekend: 1) a couple placed a very reasonable bid on our house; 2) we found a house for us to live in [after looking at SO MANY in a new metropolitan area]; and, 3) we were offered temporary positions at the university.

I wish this happens all the time but the truth is for us the same as it is for most of you: we struggle to know God’s will for our lives.....yet we cling to the historical memories of when we step out in faith.


A Faithful Response: Step out in faith believing you can do something – or, as someone also said, fake it till you make it.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

RELATIONSHIP INTEGRITY - HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

Job 27: 5b

5b till I die, I will not deny my integrity.

In seminary, Joanna** sat between the professor and I. Mesmerized by her fingers sifting through her hair, I caught myself staring. Though no one noticed me staring, I blushed and looked away.

Her short, straight hair came only to the nape of her neck. A brilliant student, her eyes sparkled when she smiled. I often tried to get her to smile at me that semester.

As Finals approached, I asked her to study with me. We found a quiet spot in the library, studied some, and spoke of our dreams for our respective futures.

As I walked home that evening, I realized that was the last time I could ever be alone with her. I did not trust myself. I was married to someone else.

I avoided Joanna the next couple of weeks. She might wave, and I would wave also, but I would immediately pretend to be busy with some task. A puzzled, hurt look would cross her eyes and I would lower my own to avoid her expression. I began to feel embarrassed, confused, and hurt myself.

I really did like her. She had a pleasant personality. Pretty and quick-witted, I had to make a tremendous effort to avoid her. I enjoyed her company but I had to decide what was important in my life.

I tried to think of the positive characteristics of my wife. But I knew this decision had to transcend mere comparisons of who I liked the best. I was not dating both of them; I was married to one of them.

I have not seen Joanna in ten years and I wonder if she even remembers me. I think if I ever do see her again I will apologize to her. Joanna may not have known I struggled so much,... but she probably did. She tried to be a friend and I tried to make more out of the relationship than what was supposed to exist. When we slip in our integrity of who we are supposed to be, we hurt not only ourselves. We also hurt those around us.

** Joanna is not her real name

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Children are young only once

Ruth 4: 16

16 Then Naomi took the child, laid him in her lap and cared for him.

“Dad, will you play trains with me?”, my four year old son asked.
“Dad, will you help me build my trail?”, my five year old son asked.
“Dad, will you ride bikes with me?”, my six year old son asked.
“Dad, will you go swimming with me?”, my seven year old son asks.

How much longer will he ask me to play with him? I wonder when I say ‘no’, if this was the last time. He’s growing up too fast. My legs are cramping more from the MS, my eyesight is worse, my hair is almost all gone. I am already unable to keep up with him sometimes, but don’t tell him that…. In his eyes, I am still the greatest.

The more love I feel as a father the more I begin to glimpse the Love my Heavenly Father has for me. God wants me to spend time with him before it is too late. He wants me to type these devotional reflections before my hands and arms cramp too much from MS. How much time will I waste in front of the television? How much more can I create instead of watching someone else’s creation? I only have one life to live and I want to leave a legacy of faith for my son and his heirs. I want to do so much more for/with my Father, but will I?

I want to do so much with my son, and yet, there’s laundry to do, grass to be mowed, checks to write,… And then I remember: I’ll always have those things to do but my son will only be young once.

A Faithful Response: Play a game with your child/grandchild…..